Do Fathers Love Conditionally?

Father, Daughter, Beach, Family, Daddy

It is often said that there is the being and then there is the doing, and that both of these aspects are important. Consequently, if someone can only adopt one of these aspects, they are going to be out of balance.

Another way to study this dynamic is to be to say that there is the masculine and then there is the feminine. When one is simply being, they’ll be in their female; whereas when they are doing, they’ll be in their masculine.

Lopsided

The feminine part of them is going to tell them that their value is based on who they are, yet the manly part of them is going to tell them that it is based on what they do. Therefore, if one has not incorporated the former, they could be out of touch with their inherent worth.

On the other hand, if a person has not incorporated the latter, then they won’t feel as though they should work for anything and that everything ought to be offered for them. Both of these scenarios will result in problems, problems which will hold them back in 1 way or another.

A Machine

Therefore, when one is out of touch with their inherent value, they can end up trying to compensate for how worthless they feel. They will believe that their worth is defined by what they achieve, meaning that their whole life could revolve around attempting to achieve things.

How they feel at a deeper level will start to rise up again, causing them to look for something else to achieve.

Stuck On a Treadmill

They won’t have the ability to attain this gold, but they will compromise their health and wellbeing, for instance, in order to try and get it.

If they were able to take a step back and to reflect on what’s taking place, they may see how futile this is. However, the pain that’s within them is likely to stop them in order to do this.

Running Away

As stressful as it will be for them to live in this manner, facing what is going on within them will be far more painful. They could believe that they only have two options: either they face how they feel and feel worthless, or they try to change how they feel by being successful.

Consequently, this individual isn’t likely to think about being, let alone allow themselves to be. They will be a human being, that much is clear, but that will be as far as it will go; it will not be possible for them to behave like one.

Another Option

Alternatively, someone like this could only face how they feel rather than attempt and do anything about it. This will probably mean that they won’t achieve very much, and they could also be accustomed to feeling depressed.

So while the person above will have obtained a masculine approach, this person will have taken a feminine approach. The first is resisting their true feelings, yet the second person has given in to them.

The Other Side

When it comes to someone who’s out of touch with their masculine aspect, they can have a strong sense of entitlement.

They are very likely to see themselves as being special and different, so it is to be expected that they would act in this way. There are a variety of things that can define whether this individual’s reality matches up with what they think.

For Example

If somebody was to come from a well-to-do background, their family might give them what they want. There’s then going to be no need for them to work for anything, as it will be dropped right into their lap – that is unless their family’s financial position changes.

Because of how they look, it is not going to be a challenge for them to fulfil this requirement – that is until they get older

Way Back

What generally plays the biggest part in an adult’s masculine and feminine development is what took place during their early years. For arguments sake, the feminine aspect is usually developed by having a mother who loves unconsciously, and the masculine aspect is usually developed by having a father who enjoys conditionally.

Each parent then plays an essential role, a role that will allow the child to grow into a balanced human being. The mother will show them that they are inherently valuable, and the father will show them that while they’re valuable, that doesn’t mean that they don’t have to work for things.

Competence

The mother will assist the child to cultivate self-worth and the dad will help the child to cultivate self-esteem, and these two components are also connected. Putting effort in to attain things won’t only enable the child to develop a sense of competence, it will also allow them to be convinced too.

If a child was to grow up with just one of those influences, it could set them up to experience problems as an adult. This can be exactly what happens when a child only has one parent around, but it may also take place when there are two.

A Closer Look

The child could have only one parent about and this parent could always tell them how amazing they are, or else they could abuse/or neglect them. This may then cause the child to develop a strong sense of entitlement, or they could become a human doing who hates themselves.

Then again, a kid could have two parents still end up developing problems. One parent could be emotionally absent and the other could see them as an extension of themselves.

A Grey Area

The love that they want will not be provided, which may set them up to behave as if they are a machine. What this shows is that it is not enough just to have two parents; they need to be healthy people

This is why it isn’t necessarily going to be better for a child to have two parents than it will be for them to get one. Having one good parent and a grandparent, for instance, is going to be better than having two bad parents and nobody else available.

Awareness

If someone can see their side of their nature is out of equilibrium, and they would like to change their life, it will be essential for them to reach out for assistance. This is some thing can be provided by the aid of a therapist or a healer.

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